Already I'm not keeping up very well.
Here's a bad idea - I'll attempt to write a poem straight into the blog update box.
Usually I work in a text editor, so I'm not sure how this will go.
It's been a few days and I've made
several mistakes. My life seems quieter,
or at least I have curled up among the
belched feathers of a dying pillow and
feigned sleep. It's the bluntness of it.
You being what you always were.
Me repeating the worst mistakes,
whitewashing the windows and shouting
down the smoke alarms. I would be angry
at a hospital stretcher. You would be
the nurse twisting my bones.
This will need perspective and editing, if I decide it's worth anything.
2 comments:
Love "belched feathers of a dying pillow" "Whitewashing the windows and shouting down the smoke alarms". Last two sentences are a really interesting image, with some great nuance. Are you "twisting my bones" for my own good, or a sadist that I should be angry at, rather than misdirecting emotions at totally inconsequential things?
There seem to be a lot of "it" 's. Not overwhelming, but something I noticed.
Keep this one, it's definitely worth something.
-Rowangrove
I count three "it"s, but considering I have a reliance on indeterminate pronouns, perhaps taking out the first would keep me out of bad habits. Thanks!
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