No luck writing tonight. This is a fragment from five years ago.
I keep waking up with these demons pushing down on me
you, inscrutable and unholy -
I wait till midnight before turning off the light
I leave for you
head to toe is okay
as long as we don't touch.
2 comments:
I really enjoyed the last two lines of this. They made me smile even though the rest of the poem is more dreary.
I'm having trouble getting what "I leave for you" means in this context. The first three lines are really evocative. Feels like that sense of struggling to push through a nightmare and wake up, right as you're about to become conscious but before you regain full control of your body. The last two lines are good, but a little disconnected. It makes me wonder why a person who is so afraid or disgusted by this other person would want to be even head to toe...?
I'd like to see the first three lines incorporated into something a little more fleshed out, but as a fragment it's not bad at all.
-Rowangrove
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